Friday, November 22, 2024

Top 5 This Week

Ugandans Mourn The Death Of Tamale Mirundi

Throughout his life, motormouthed Tamale Mirundi was controversial .

Here are some of his notable quotes.

1.If God gives a girl beauty without brains, it’s the private part which suffers.

  1. You’re a woman you have attended more than 15 weddings this year and you’re still single not yet married. Are u a cake or a tent?
  2. If Miria Matembe is a strong woman, why didn’t she give birth with her knickers on!
  3. If you go to a bar, spot ugly all the girls first and if they start looking beautiful it’s time for u to go home.
  4. How can u ask a Muslim whether to be served fried or roasted pork?
  5. Some men don’t know how to Romance women.. They only play with their nipples as if they are tuning radio stations.
  6. You cant say the Bishop asked all virgin girls to show up and a Nnalongo( mother of twins) shows up
  7. However much u shake your small man, the last drop belongs to pants.
  8. You complain of fuel prices as if u bought the vehicle thinking it consumes milk.
  9. If a Nnalongo (mother of twins) leaves a lodge limping,don’t send there a virgin
  10. Never be scared when an impotent man sits next to your wife
  11. Some fools instead of sleeping, are busy texting someone’s gal friend.

18.A girl can only undermine a man’s size if never been raped before

  1. If you are a poor man and you date a rich man’s house girl, never make a mistake of making her pregnant or else you have nowhere to eat food

20 If it’s true you are a Muslim and the price of pork rises why do you join those striking.

  1. He who sleeps with an itchy anus wakes up with smelly fingers
  2. How can a thief be the one to advise you on the kind of padlock to put on our house’s door?
  3. The cardinal Priest cannot fundraise for a witchdoctor’s shrine
  4. You can’t get married and remain a virgin
  5. You don’t booze, have no girlfriend but you still complain of being broke yet your friends that empty bars are building and excelling
  6. I am like a car exhaust, I face where I am coming from.
  7. I am the president’s dog, I attack anyone who comes near his fence
  8. A baby can play with the mother’s breasts but not de fathers testicles.
  9. However big the number of rabbits are, they can never equal a single lion.
  10. Its foolhardy for a cat seeing a farmer getting out the milking can( to milk) and it runs away.
  11. When thieves break into the house and your wife says, husband make sure they don’t enter the third bedroom, know she is part of them.
  12. The job(Presidential press secretary) was like a flight where you find yourselves aboard and if the plane gets a problem, you all perish. We all have different journeys and that was mine.
  13. Museveni is the Queen (Elizabeth II)’s heir.
  14. When moving to a certain direction and see no vehicle or anyone coming from there, I will change direction.
  15. If it was about showing might, in-laws would go to the bride’s family for introduction naked.
  16. Mbabazi(Amama) is like a builder who made sure while building, the house is weak so that when he returns, it is easy for him to break it.

38.When a boat accident happens and you see a crocodile rushing to the scene, don’t think it is coming to save lives.

  1. You cant say a man who has been hungry the entire day is the one who spoilt the toilet paper.
  2. I have been a hangman, killing only those brought to me. Now that I have retired, I won’t be responsible any more

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